Added: Enid Jameson - Date: 06.02.2022 17:44 - Views: 46105 - Clicks: 2183
But the research suggests that up to 62 per cent of women experience fantasies about some sort of non-consensual sexual encounter at least once in their lives, 14 per cent of them have these fantasies at least weekly, and 9 to 14 per cent consider them their most frequent or favourite fantasies. Justin Lehmiller is an American social psychologist and sex researcher who has studied these fantasies, most recently for his book Tell Me What You Want But, though common, such fantasies can be uncomfortable for those who experience them, and cultural critics perpetuate that feeling.
Some say that the fantasies are a protective mechanism for women taught to believe that they should not have sexual urges. She stresses that she is a part of the movement, but argues that elements of its cultural narrative can contribute to the pathologisation of forced-sex fantasies. So how can the many women who experience rape fantasies, but reject rape culture, reconcile their erogeny and ideology, especially in rape kink era of heightened cultural scrutiny?
T his is an especially difficult task, given that academics and cultural critics have offered many different possible explanations for rape fantasies — some of them pathologising, and some of them not — but few have backed their ideas with evidence. Some scholars, Hawley points out, base their theories on their own personal interpretations of fantasies.
However, it is not easy, she acknowledges, for everyone to dig into that literature and deconstruct each explanation and its merits or demerits. It might be tempting to reject the notion of rape fantasies as toxic cultural conditioning by swinging the other way and arguing that they are an inherent part of our animal nature: males are dominant and females are submissive, naturally.
But such evolutionary arguments, Hawley points out, often rely on slim, over-interpreted evidence. And, adds M, they might not be that convincing for those exploring such fantasies — people rape kink do recognise some reflection of contemporary culture in their desires. Many evolutionary arguments are still ultimately pathologising, when they argue, for examplethat submission and rape fantasies evolved as coping mechanisms in our female ancestors to survive systematic rape by our male ancestors.
Plus, they do not for the reality that both Hawley and Lehmiller note: men can also have fantasies about being dominated by forceful women or men — experiencing sex with varying degrees of non-consent or violence. The majority of rape fantasies involve someone the fantasiser actually desires, often despite persistent resistance to them, and sometimes only without clear consent.
Even in a rape-laden culture, there is no single explanation for rape fantasies. Some people, M notes, might use such fantasies to process their feelings about all the sexual violence they observe in the world. Transgression is part of what wakes us up and makes us feel sexual.
Or, as some sex therapists have noted, dominant people might want to relinquish their dominance and feel submission in controlled mental or physical spaces. How do people square that [with their personal values]? M notes that it would be great if people with rape fantasies had the space to openly deconstruct them. Others in kink and academic circles worry that talking openly about forceful fantasies could pour fuel on anti- MeToo reactionary movements.
That is a sad reality, because talking openly about these fantasies is rape kink key to helping many who experience them avoid any confusion and self-recrimination, and instead learn to explore their thoughts safely and constructively. Rape kink that is where our culture is today: in a state of flux, and a state of discomfort, in which it still takes pain and often isolation for many to learn that the sexual thoughts in their he are not only common, but also valid.
Gentle medicine could radically transform medical practice. Childhood and adolescence. Forbeing carefree is intrinsic to a well-lived life. Meaning and the good life. Sooner or later we all face death. Will a sense of meaning help us?
Kristopher Nielsen. Rituals and celebrations. We need highly formal rituals in order to make life more democratic. Antone Martinho-Truswell. Fantasies of forced sex are common. Do they enable rape culture? Sex and sexuality Gender and identity Subcultures.
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The Psychology Behind A Very Common Fantasy